“Is There Room for Erotica in Christianity?”

“I knew there wouldn’t be a second date the moment the guy asked this question:
“How do you feel about strip clubs?”

Not for ‘em, I said.

“What about porn?”

Are you kidding?

In the conversation that followed, I rebutted his defenses of both. He, a Christian (nominally, at least), was a consumer of erotic media, convinced that using it can be good. He is the only Christian I’ve met who has defended pornography. But he is not the only Christian who defends other kinds of erotic media.”

To read the rest of my latest essay for RELEVANTmagazine.com, click on this: “Is There Room for Erotica in Christianity?”

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

  • Wow, how did that come up on a first date?!!

    I agree with you, mostly, but a better question, I think, is this: what about a Christian guy (or woman, for that matter) who knows porn, fantasy, objectification, the 50 Shades of Gray series,(or, to just use your word, “erotica”) may be wrong/unhealthy, but is caught up in the midst of it and doesn’t know how to get out of it? Would that person get a second date? Because in my view, among Christians, that may be the bigger problem.

    Regardless, you may enjoy the following article, if you have never seen it:

    http://www.cardus.ca/comment/article/1575/sex-is-easier-than-love-why-sexuality-is-at-the-very-heart-of-life-and-learning

    • Ooo, fabulous point, Chris. Thanks for this feedback!

      I agree: I think there ARE far more Christians who think “erotica” isn’t good but who are caught up in it anyway than there are Christians who think erotica ISN’T bad. While I know no woman or man who hopes to date somebody who’s addicted to porn (and the ideal, of course, is for someone addicted to it to get help), I think the former totally could get a second date. It isn’t as much the use of erotica as the belief about the use of erotica that breaks the deal. A person who has a problem with erotica use can get help. A person who doesn’t think erotica use is a problem likely doesn’t define love or sex the same way I do, which wouldn’t work.

      And re: “Wow, how did that come up on a first date?!!” – I KNOW. Actually, it came up on the phone after the first date, but before we’d planned a second. But still. Am I a situation magnet, or am I a situation magnet? 😉

    • Oh, and thanks for sharing the article! I’m emailing it to myself now and will read it ASAP. Hadn’t come across this one yet.

  • Hey Arleen! I’m a copywriter in Jacksonville. Loved the article. I couldn’t believe the amount of women in my own church who were excited to see that movie! I thought I was the only person who thought there was something wrong with a group of Christian women seeing a movie about male strippers. And to the guy who blew that date with you…what a loser! I look forward to reading some more of your work!

    • Ryan,

      My apologies for the delayed response! I just now noticed your comment (For some reason, Blogger had tagged it as spam.). Thanks so much for the kind words.